Yes, the medallion has been found, but there's still lots to talk about. Feel the need for more than virtual discussion? Then join the Re-Hash Bash, Sunday, Jan. 27, at noon at Merriam Park in St. Paul.
I have a friend coming over in a bit to install a faster drive on my computer (watch out). So I will be back later this afternoon for a bit to hear if a place & time has been chosen for Sat.
Two doctors opened offices in a small town and put up a sign reading "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology."
The town fathers were not too happy with the sign and they proposed "Hysterias and Posteriors."
The Doctors didn't find it acceptable, and suggested "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids."
The town didn't like that either and countered with "Catatonics and High Colonics."
Thumbs down again, by now the story was in the papers and suggestions began rolling in:
Manic-depressives and Anal-retentives, Minds and Behinds, Lost Souls and A**-holes, Analysis and Anal Cysts, Nuts and Butts, Freaks and Cheeks, Loons and Moons,
None of these satisfied one side or the other, but they finally settled on "Dr. Smith & Dr. Jones, Odds & Ends."
For thousands of years, men have tried to understand the rules when dealing with women. Finally, this merit/demerit guide will help you to understand just how it works. Remember, in the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the points system:
SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed........................................+1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows.... 0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets...................-1
You leave the toilet seat up..................................-5
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty............ 0
When the toilet paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex...-1
When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom...........-2
You go out to buy her extra-light panty liners with wings.....+5
in the snow...............................+8
but return with beer.......-5
and no liners.........................-25
You check out a suspicious noise at night..................... 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing............ 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something..........+5
You pummel it with a six iron................................+10
It's her cat.................................................-40
AT THE PARTY
You stay by her side the entire party............ 0
You stay by her side for a while, then leave
to chat with a College drinking buddy.............-2
Named Tiffany....................................-4
Tiffany is a dancer..............................-10
With breast implants............................-50
HER BIRTHDAY
You remember her birthday................................0
You buy a card and flowers...............................0
You take her out to dinner.............................. 0
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar....+1
Okay, it is a sports bar................................-2
And it's all-you-can-eat night..........................-3
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team........-10
A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS
Go with a pal.......................................0
The pal is happily married..........................+1
The pal is single...................................-7
He drives a Ferrari.................................-10
With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED)........-15
A NIGHT OUT WITH HER
You take her to a movie...............+2
You take her to a movie she likes.....+4
You take her to a movie you hate......+6
You take her to a movie you like......-2
It's called Death Cop 3...............-3
Which features Cyborgs that eat humans....-9
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans.....-15
YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable pot belly................-15
You develop a noticeable pot belly & exercise to get rid of it...+10
You develop a noticeable pot belly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts...........................-30
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too.".................-800
THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?"
You hesitate in responding......................-10
You reply, "Where?".............................-35
You reply, "No, I think it's your butt".........-100
Any other response..............................-20
On another note, I got the Vanilla Sky soundtrack (I have never seen the movie). It is too slow and moody for me. There are a few okay songs, but it is not great. BLAH - another $13 down the drain.
The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates.
Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used. Why did "they" use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.
Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts.
So, who built these old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since.
And the ruts? The initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons, were first made by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome, they were alike in the matter of wheel spacing.
Thus, we have the answer to the original questions. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derived from the original specification for an Imperial Roman army war chariot.
Specs and Bureaucracies live forever. Therefore, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may be exactly right. Because the Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back-ends of two war horses.
Plus:
There's an interesting extension of the story about railroad gauge and horses' behinds. When we see a Space Shuttle sitting on the launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are the solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at a factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line to the factory runs through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than a railroad track, and the railroad track is about as wide as two horses' behinds.
So a major design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined by the width of a horse's backside!
Hi AW, Ares, THX & Me2 - How's life today?
is that spelled right?
T H A T....that.
2490 posts in the cooler, 2490 posts, type them down, catch a JOE, 2490 posts in the cooler.....
lalalalalalala
afternoon cm.
it just doesn't look loke proper latin, me2.
And that doesn't look like proper English.
I don't know if it's right. I stole it from a quotes web page.
Another post for the pile
Damn - forgot about the tag line...
Good eye Ares. And quick too.
And that doesn't look like proper English.
I speak good english fine!
I speak good english fine!
LOL!
had to re-read all that to get it---got it! good one THX AND Ares-use guys got smarts or sumtin' :D
THX AND Ares-yous guys got smarts or sumtin' :D
jealous? hey, its not like i'm an expert at latin or anything. it just didn't look right.
AW- I am interested to hear about the Radisson thing-tell me Sat.
What's Latin?
the language whence french, italian, spanish, portuguese, and romanian are derived. the language of the roman empire.
see what?
I have a friend coming over in a bit to install a faster drive on my computer (watch out). So I will be back later this afternoon for a bit to hear if a place & time has been chosen for Sat.
the only thing i'm reading into is you and your pile ;)
:: ducks from the whip ::
yes dear.
gotta read quickly
I hear another song coming on...
here I am all alone again...
2470 posts in the cooler, 2470 posts, type them down, catch a JOE, 2470 posts in the cooler.....
lalalalalalala
you're not alone. sick maybe, but not alone.
hey, not being sick just alone, singing cooler songs :)
no one will sing with me, we could be a quartet now instead of a trio :) Ian, Ares, ? and Me2 (who was that 3rd one)
you are the one thinking what you are thinking when you think it!
the language whence french, italian, spanish, portuguese, and romanian are derived. the language of the roman empire.
Yeah right, Ahres. Some wonderful magical language.
hey. you asked.
I'm just kiddin', chill out there Mr!
:-)
Off to a meetin'. Later
Another joke for the pile:
“The Sign"
Two doctors opened offices in a small town and put up a sign reading "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology."
The town fathers were not too happy with the sign and they proposed "Hysterias and Posteriors."
The Doctors didn't find it acceptable, and suggested "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids."
The town didn't like that either and countered with "Catatonics and High Colonics."
Thumbs down again, by now the story was in the papers and suggestions began rolling in:
Manic-depressives and Anal-retentives, Minds and Behinds, Lost Souls and A**-holes, Analysis and Anal Cysts, Nuts and Butts, Freaks and Cheeks, Loons and Moons,
None of these satisfied one side or the other, but they finally settled on "Dr. Smith & Dr. Jones, Odds & Ends."
You're a great joke teller. THANKS :)
for those of you on the point system:
THE RULES FOR MEN EXPLAINED
For thousands of years, men have tried to understand the rules when dealing with women. Finally, this merit/demerit guide will help you to understand just how it works. Remember, in the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the points system:
SIMPLE DUTIES
AT THE PARTY
HER BIRTHDAY
A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS
A NIGHT OUT WITH HER
YOUR PHYSIQUE
THE BIG QUESTION
continued....
I am going for now...see you all later :)
here's the rest of the points system:
COMMUNICATION When she wants to talk about a problem:
Ares, that is wonderful. My brother and I have a long standing joke about the point system. I have to mail that to him.
Thanks!
in that case, lee, you should have mail.
Oh, BTW - my qwest email seems to have stopped working today (2 weeks after I went to bitstream)
Thanks Ares-I printed it for Super Bowl Football Sunday!
--So? How do you win? Oh, yeah, the man never wins :)
Are there levels where a man gets things for so many points?
hmmmmmmmmmmm
Thanks, he will love it.
well, a month and a half after my account was supposed to be closed i've still got access to qwest.
Are there levels where a man gets things for so many points?
don't ask me. i don't make the rules.
As a rule, men get nothing. Women sometimes have good days and happy thing happen, but men shouldn't count on it.
On another note, I got the Vanilla Sky soundtrack (I have never seen the movie). It is too slow and moody for me. There are a few okay songs, but it is not great. BLAH - another $13 down the drain.
I think I will change some of those rules to suit our situation--this will be fun :)
leelabell-take it to Cheapo - you can at least make a couple bucks back
still more useless information:
The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates.
Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used. Why did "they" use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.
Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts.
So, who built these old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since.
And the ruts? The initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons, were first made by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome, they were alike in the matter of wheel spacing.
Thus, we have the answer to the original questions. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derived from the original specification for an Imperial Roman army war chariot.
Specs and Bureaucracies live forever. Therefore, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may be exactly right. Because the Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back-ends of two war horses.
Plus:
There's an interesting extension of the story about railroad gauge and horses' behinds. When we see a Space Shuttle sitting on the launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are the solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at a factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line to the factory runs through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than a railroad track, and the railroad track is about as wide as two horses' behinds.
So a major design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined by the width of a horse's backside!
Ares-I am gonna add to that list...
points for...
the man who is OK with his wife standing in the middle of Highland park alone at night, talking with a stranger (Ian) on the phone...
...OK with his wife standing ouside Ma Press at night waiting for a newspaper...
OK with her searching for the medallion at ANY time of the day or night...during this time he takes care of the house and family. :)
isn't it expected though, me2, that the man would come along with?
Ares, you have waaaaayyyy too much time...
oh...you get a "yes sir" WOW
WoW-I cannot believe you just typed all that - I agree with therecanbeonlyone! BUTT, it is a great story. Thanks Ares :)
HI therecanbeonlyone
whats new therecanbeonlyone? hehehe you know I love to type your name therecanbeonlyone :)