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:: shudder :: i'm probably gonna shoot myself for this later, but sing, post stories, whatever. but no barney i say! courtesy of artemis for your lyrics pleasure: |
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Leisure Suit Lyrics and Video Lounge and PPWC Karaoke Bar
I will have to remember that... I hope I am not to tired by then....
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Chorus:
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Chorus:
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Now IÂ’m just rollinÂ’ home into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you
very nice
Now you say you're lonely
You cried the long night through
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
Now you say you're sorry
For being so untrue
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
You drove me,
Nearly drove me out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember?
I remember all that you said
Told me love was too plebeian
Told me you were through with me and
Now you say you love me
Well, just to prove you do
Cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
You drove me
Nearly drove me out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember?
I remember all that you said
Told me love was to plebeian
Told me you were through with me...
And now you say you love me
Well, just to prove that you do...
Come on! come on!
Cry me a river...
Cry me a river...
I cried a river over you
I cried a river over you...
Huh
Charlie's Mother: You get blue like everyone
But me and Grandpa Joe
Can make your troubles go away
Blow away, there they go...
Cheer up, Charlie
Give me a smile
What happened to the smile I used to know
Don't you know your grin has always
Been my sunshine;
Let that sunshine show...
Come on, Charlie
No need to frown
Deep down you know tomorrow is your toy...
When the days get heavy
Never pitter patter
Up and at'em boy
Some day, sweet as a song
Charlie's lucky day will come along
Till that day
You've got to stay strong Charlie
Up on top is right where you belong
Look up, Charlie
You'll see a star
Just follow it and keep your dreams in view
Pretty soon the sky is going to clear up
Charlie,
Cheer up Charlie,do
Cheer up Charlie
Just be glad you're you.
Oompa Loompa doompadee doo
I've got another puzzle for you
Oompa Loompa doompadah dee
If you are wise you'll listen to me
What do you get from a glut of TV?
A pain in the neck and an IQ of three
Why don't you try simply reading a book?
Or could you just not bear to look?
You'll get no
You'll get no
You'll get no
You'll get no
You'll get no commercials
Oompa Loompa Doompadee Dah
If you're not greedy you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa
Oompa Loompa doompadee do
Oompa Loompas:
Oompa Loompa, doompadee doo
We have a perfect puzzle for you
Oompa Loompa, doompadee dee
If you are wise you will listen me
What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
I don't like the look of it
Oompa Loompa, doompadee dah
If you're not greedy you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doompadee do
Doompadee do
http://chocolatefactorymovie.warnerbros.com/games.html#
'Twas da night befo' Christmas and all in da hood,
Not a homie was stirring cuz it was all good.
Da tube socks was hung on da window sill
and we all had smiles up on our grill.
Mookie and BeBe was snug in da crib
in the back bedroom, cuz dat's how we live.
And Mom's in her do-rag and me with my nine,
had just gotten busy, cuz girlfriend is fine.
All of a sudden a lowrider rolled by,
Bumpin' phat beats cuz da system's fly.
I bounced to da window at a quarter pas'
'Bout ready to pop a cap in somebody's ass!
well anyway....
I yelled to my lady, "Yo peep dis!"
She said, "Stop frontin' & just mind yo' bidness."
I said, "For real doe, come check dis out."
We weren't even buggin', no worries, no doubt.
Cuz bumpin' an thumpin' from around da way
Was Santa, 8 reindeer and a sleigh.
Da beats was kickin', da ride was phat
I said, "Yo Red Dawg, you all dat!"
He threw up a sign and yelled to his boyz,
"Ay yo, give it up, let's make some noise!"
To da top of da projects & across da strip mall,
We gots ta go, I got a booty call!"
He pulled up his ride on da top a da roof,
and sippin' on a 40, he busted a move.
I yelled up to Santa, "Yo ain't got no stack!"
He said, "Damn homie, deese projects is wack!
But don't worry black, cuz I gots da skillz
I learnt back when I hadda pay da billz."
Out from his bag he pulled 3 small tings
a credit card, a knife, and a bobby pin.
He slid down the fire exscape smoove as a cat,
and busted da window wid a b-ball bat.
I said, "Whassup, Santa? Whydya bust my place?"
He said, "You best get on up out my face!"
His threads was all leatha, his chains was all gold,
His sneaks was Puma and dey was 5 years old.
He dropped down da duffle, Clippers logo on da side.
Santa broke out da loot and my mouf popped open wide.
A wink of his eye and a shine off his gold toof,
He cabbage patched his way back onto da roof
He jumped in his hooptie wid rims made a chrome,
To tap dat booty waitin' at home.
And all I heard as he cruised outta sight,
was a loud and hearty.....
"WEEESST SIIIIDE!!!!!!! Good Night!"
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the trailer
Not a creature was stirrin' 'cept a redneck named Taylor.
His first name was Bubba, Joe was his middle,
And a-runnin' down his chin was a trickle of spittle.
His socks, they were hung by the chimney with care,
And therefore there was a foul stench in the air.
That Bubba got scared and rousted the boys.
There was Rufus, 12 Jim Bob was 11
Dud goin' on 10 Otis was 7.
John, George and Chucky Were 5,4, and 3:
The twins were both girls so they let them be.
They jumped in their overalls, no need for a shirt,
Threw a hat on each head, then turned with a jerk.
They ran to the gun rack that hung on the wall.
There were 17 shotguns they grabbed them all.
Bubba said to the young'uns, "now hesh up ya'll!
The last thing we wanna do is wake up yer Maw."
Maw was expecting and needed her sleep,
So out they crept out the door without making a peep.
They all looked around, and then they all spit.
The young'uns asked Bubba, "Paw, what is it?"
Bubba just stared he could not say a word.
This was just like all of The stories he'd heard.
It was Santy Claus on the roof, darn tootin'
But the boys didn't know they was about to start shootin'!
They aimed their shotguns and nearly made a mistake
That would have resulted in venison steak.
Bubba hollered out, "don't shoot, boys!"
That's Santy Claus And he's brought us some toys.
The dogs were a-barkin' and a-raisin' cain,
And Bubba whistled, and shouted, and called them by name.
"Down, Spot! shut up Bullet! quiet, Roscoe and Enos!
Git, Turnip and Tater and Sam and Bosco!"
"Git down from that porch! git down off that wall!
Quit shakin the trailer, or you'll make Santy fall!"
The dogs kept a-barkin' and wouldn't shut up,
And they trampled poor Pete Who was only a pup.
Santy opened his bag, And threw out some toys.
Bubba got most, but left a few for the boys.
Since the guns had been dropped he just might not die.
He jumped in his sleigh, told his reindeer to hurry.
The trailer started to wobble santa started to worry.
Just as the reindeer got into the air,
The trailer collapsed, but Bubba didn't care.
He was busy lookin' at all his new toys.
Then a thought hit him, and he said to the boys:
"Go check on yer Maw, make sure she's all right.
That roof fallin' on her could-a hurt just a might."
But Maw was OK, and the girls were too.
They fixed up the trailer it looked good as new.
And as for Bubba, he liked Old St. Nick,
But Santa thought Bubba was a pure-in-tee hick!
Bubba had a nice Christmas, and the boys did, too.
And the Taylors wish a Yee Haw Merry Christmas to you!!!
Otis was 7
heh
'Twas the night after Christmas and all through the trailer,
the beer had gone flat and the pizza was staler.
The tube socks hung empty, no candies or toys
and I was camped out on my old Lay-Z-Boy.
The kids they weren't talking to me or my wife,
the worst Christmas they said they had had in their lives.
My wife couldn't argue and neither could I,
so I watched TV and my wife, she just cried.
When out in the yard the dog started barkin',
I stood up and looked and I saw Sheriff Larkin.
He yelled, "Roy I am sworn to uphold the laws
and I got a complaint here from a feller named Claus."
I said, "Claus, I don't know nobody named Claus,
and you ain't taking me in without probable cause."
Then the Sheriff he said, "The man was shot at last night."
I said, "That might have been me, just what's he look like."
The Sheriff replied, "Well he's a jolly old feller,
with a big beer gut belly, that shakes when he laughs like a bowl full of jelly.
He sports a long beard, and a nose like a cherry."
I said, "Sheriff that sounds like my wife's sister Sherri."
"It's no time for jokes Roy" the Sheriff he said.
"The man I'm describing in dressed all in red.
I'm here for the truth now, it's time to come clean.
Tell me what you've done, tell me what you've seen."
Well I started to lie then I thought what the hell,
it wouldn't have been the first time that I've spent New Years in jail.
I said, "Sheriff it happened last night about ten,
and I thought that my wife had been drinking again."
When she walked in from work she was as white as a ghost.
I thought maybe she had seen one of them UFO's.
But she said that a bunch of deer had just flown over her head,
and stopped on the roof of our good neighbour Red.
Well I ran outside to look and the sight made me shudder,
a freezer full of venison standing right on Red's gutter.
Well my hands were a shakin' as I grabbed my gun,
when outta Red's chimney this feller did run.
And slung on his back was this bag over flowin'.
I thought he stolen Red's stuff while old Red was out bowling'.
So I yelled, "Drop fat boy, hands in the air!"
But he went about his business like he hadn't a care.
So I popped a warning shot over his head.
Well he dropped that bag and he jumped in that sled.
And as he flew off I heard him extort,
"That's assault with intent Roy, I'll see ya in court."
Everyone was really tense
Waiting down there
He had his own world just like I had mine
We'll go seperate ways 'til the next time
There are no words to say as
My friend swims away
Captain Nemo said, "okay"
(five, four, three, two, one)
Then I raised my hand and waved
Captain Nemo went away
(Love me when I'm gone)
Left me all alone, Nemo's going home
And as I watched him, police boats approached
An alien force haunting us like ghosts
"Wish I could stay here and play for a while
But I must be on my way..."
The warmest of smiles
Then he dived into the waves among the other whales
Captain Nemo said, "okay"
(five, four, three, two, one)
Then I raised my hand and waved
Captain Nemo went away
(Love me when I'm gone)
Left me all alone, Nemo's going home...
Stroh wird gold
Und gold wird stein
Deine grösse macht mich klein
Du darfst mein bestrafer sein
Ja
Der herrgott nimmt
Der herrgott gibt
Bestrafe mich
Bestrafe mich
Du meinst ja
Und ich denk nein
Schliess mich ein in dein gebet
Bevor der wind noch kälter weht
Deine grösse macht mich klein
Du darfst mein bestrafer sein
Du darfst mein bestrafer sein
Deine grösse macht mich klein
Du darfst mein bestrafer sein
Deine grösse macht ihn klein
Du darfst meine strafe sein
Der herrgott nimmt
Der herrgott gibt
Doch gibt er nur dem
Den er auch liebt
Bestrafe mich
(translation:
Punish me
---------
Punish me
Punish me
Straw is gold
And gold is stone
You are so big, make me small
You're the master,
Make me crawl
The lord does give
The lord does take
Punish me
Punish me
You say yes
And i say no
Lock me in all you worship
Before the wind's cold hand grips
You are so big, make me small
You're the master, make me crawl
You're the master, make me crawl
You are so big, make me small
You're the master, make me crawl
You're so big you make him small
You will punish me for all
The lord does give
The lord does take
Does he give love to
Those he forsakes?
Punish me )
Dough, the stuff that buys me beer.
Ray, the guy who brings me beer.
Me, the guy who drinks the beer.
Far, a long way to get beer.
So, I'll have another beer.
La, I'll have another beer.
Tea, no thanks I'm having beer.
That will bring us back to...
(reaching the crescendo of his toast,
Homer looks into his beer mug,
which is empty) ...DOH!!!
--Homer Simpson
somebody threw a spanner and they threw him in the hole
there's rumors in the loading bay and anger in the town
somebody blew the whistle and the walls came down
there's a meeting in the boardroom they're trying to trace the smell
there's leaking in the washroom there's a sneak in personnel
somewhere in the corridors someone was heard to sneeze
'goodness me could this be Industrial Disease?
The caretaker was crucified for sleeping at his post
they're refusing to be pacified it's him they blame the most
the watchdog's got rabies the foreman's got fleas
and everyone's concerned about Industrial Disease
there's panic on the switchboard tongues are ties in knots
some come out in sympathy some come out in spots
some blame the management some the employees
and everybody knows it's the Industrial Disease
The work force is disgusted downs tools and walks
innocence is injured experience just talks
everyone seeks damages and everyone agrees
that these are 'classic symptoms of a monetary squeeze'
on ITV and BBC they talk about the curse
philosophy is useless theology is worse
history boils over there's an economics freeze
sociologists invent words that mean 'Industrial Disease'
Doctor Parkinson declared 'I'm not surprised to see you here
you've got smokers cough from smoking, brewer's droop from drinking beer
I don't know how you came to get the Betty Davis knees
but worst of all young man you've got Industrial Disease'
he wrote me a prescription he said 'you are depressed
but I'm glad you came to see me to get this off your chest
come back and see me later - next patient please
send in another victim of Industrial Disease'
I go down to Speaker's Corner I'm thunderstruck
they got free speech, tourists, police in trucks
two men say they're Jesus one of them must be wrong
there's a protest singer singing a protest song - he says
'they wanna have a war to keep us on our knees
they wanna have a war to keep their factories
they wanna have a war to stop us buying Japanese
they wanna have a war to stop Industrial Disease
they're pointing out the enemy to keep you deaf and blind
they wanna sap your energy incarcerate your mind
they give you Rule Brittania, gassy beer, page three
two weeks in Espana and Sunday striptease'
meanwhile the first Jesus says 'I'd cure it soon
abolish monday mornings and friday afternoons'
the other one's on a hunger strike he's dying by degrees
how come Jesus gets Industrial Disease
mmmmmm beer
Old timer, Old timer
It's too late to die young now
Old timer, five and dimer
Trying to find a way to age like wine somehow
my new stuff is nothing like my old stuff was
and either one is much when compared to a show
which will not be as good as another one you saw...
so hell me, i know, i
know, i know
I am an old timer, old timer
it's too late to die young now
old timer, five and dimer
trying to find a way to age like wine somehow
I meant every fool that ever signed
their name up on these walls in the backs of these beer halls and concert halls.
I been threw seven managers,
five labels, a thousand picks and patch cables,
three bands, a band, a bunch of guitar stands,
and cans, and cans, and cans of beer, a bottles of boozes and bags of pot,
and a thousand other things that I forgot.
I thought that I be dead by now... but I'm not.
Album - East Nashville Skyline
http://www.toddsnider.net
Rudolph Got Run Over by my Grandma
just as he arrived on Christmas Day
She had gotten sick and tired of hearin'
that song where she gets trampled by a sleigh.
She'd been listening to the radio
and she nearly lost her breath
yellin' cuss words at the DJ
for playin' that song where she gets hooved to death.
So she set out on the warpath
there was evil in her eye
she said "I'm gonna find that reindeer
and by golly, one of us is gonna die!"
Rudolph Got Run Over by my Grandma
just as he arrived on Christmas Day
She had gotten sick and tired of hearin'
that song where she gets trampled by a sleigh.
Santa Claus had made a landing
on the new expressway
Grandma was doin' 120
with her headlights pointed straight at Santa's sleigh.
'Twas an awful sound of impact
Grandma really nailed him good
There were hoofprints on her windshield
and a pair of ripped-off antlers on her hood
Rudolph Got Run Over by my Grandma
just as he arrived on Christmas Day
She had gotten sick and tired of hearin'
that song where she gets trampled by a sleigh.
Guess we'll all be missing Rudolph
in the winter when it snows
but now he's up in reindeer heaven
with a Buick logo stamped into his nose.
But there's no regret from Grandma
as she drove away, she sneered,
and then she hollered out the window
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a FLAT DEER!"
Rudolph Got Run Over by my Grandma
just as he arrived on Christmas Day
She had gotten sick and tired of hearin' that song where she gets trampled by a sleigh.
Grandma got ran over by a Taser
Grandma got ran over by a Taser
Driving home from our house Christmas Day
The bully cop stopped her then he tased her
When she said "Don't you talk to me that way"
Grandpa, he was out Christmas shopping
Over on the other side of town
He stopped his car along the busy highway
When he saw Grandma flopping on the ground
Grandpa stepped out his car and tried to help her
The cop he slapped him with the Taser too
Those cops they like to Taser little children
Whose next? It could be me it could be you
Words and music by John Rox
performed by Gayla Peevey (1953)
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
Don't want a doll, no dinky Tinker Toy
I want a hippopotamus to play with and enjoy
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
I don't think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won't have to use our dirty chimney flue
Just bring him through the front door,
that's the easy thing to do
I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see a hippo hero standing there
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses
I only like hippopotamuses
And hippopotamuses like me too
Mom says the hippo would eat me up, but then
Teacher says a hippo is a vegeterian
There's lots of room for him in our two-car garage
I'd feed him there and wash him there and give him his massage
I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see a hippo hero standing there
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles or rhinoceroseses
I only like hippopotamuseses
And hippopotamuses like me too!
It is one of the most requested christmas songs this year I guess... (not my version...) :pbpt:
And wouldnÂ’t you love to love her
Takes to the sky like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover
All your life youÂ’ve never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you heaven
Will you ever win
She is like a cat in the dark
And then she is the darkness
She rules her life like a fine skylark
And when the sky is starless
All your life youÂ’ve never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you heaven
Will you ever win
Will you ever win
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
She rings like a bell throu the night
And wouldnÂ’t you love to love her
She rules her life like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover
All your life youÂ’ve never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you heaven
Will you ever win
Will you ever win
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Oooooh
Taken by
Taken by the sky
Taken by
Taken by the sky
Taken by
Taken by the sky
Dreams unwind
Loves a state of mind
Dreams unwind
Loves a state of mind
I just got done talking to a girl with this name.......so had to post the song...
When we were north a couple weeks ago, listening to a station out of Duluth playing Christmas music, there was one of the funniest things I had ever heard. I would love to hear it again, but have no idea who did it, what the name of it is, or anything else helpful.
It was song by a man - as a young boy who wasn't getting anything for Christmas this year. It went on to describe some of the things he had done, including rigging up some skateboard thing with rockets and telling the neighbor's cat to hold on while he attempted to send the contraption into space.
As the whole thing progresses, there are a couple more incidents with that cat and the neighbor. Funny stuff.
You like the movies
And I like T.V.
I take things serious
And you take 'em light
I go to bed early
And I party all night
Our friends are sayin'
We ain't gonna last
Cuz I move slowly
And baby I'm fast
I like it quiet
And I love to shout
But when we get together
It just all work out
I take-2 steps forward
I take-2 steps back
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
And you know-it ain't fiction
Just a natural fact
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
Who'd a thought we could be lovers
She makes the bed
And steals the covers
She likes it neat
And he makes a mess
I take it easy
Baby I get obsessed
She's got the money
And he's always broke
I don't like cigarettes
And I like to smoke
Things in common
Just ain't a one
But when we get together
We have nothin' but fun
I take-2 steps forward
I take-2 steps back
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
And you know-it ain't fiction
Just a natural fact
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
Baby ain't it somethin'
How we lasted this long
You and me
Provin' everyone wrong
Don't think we'll ever
Get our differences patched
Don't really matter
Cuz we're perfectly matched
Even tho she's 3' tall
heck, with a nose like that? I'd take you at 3 feet tall :wink:
A 3' tall Paula Abdul :pbpt:
wearing a top hat
will you take a 6 foot tall cardboard st pattys day woman with beer?